Premature Ejaculation

This is one of those extremely sensitive subjects that most men are reluctant to discuss with anyone, even their doctor; yet quite a number of men suffer from this problem and need advice.

This web site is a perfect place for us to present this material because men can read it in privacy and without embarassment. Below is a standard self-help protocol recommended by many sex therapists.


Premature ejaculation is very common, especially among younger men, or after extended periods of abstinence from sex. In fact, medical specialists believe that all men experience premature ejaculation at some point in their lives, so you're not alone.

While there are no known medical causes for the condition, sex therapists have a 98 % success rate for helping men learn to delay ejaculation. One of the most common ways to increase control is called the start/stop method. The start/stop method is an eight-step exercise you can try at home. The goal of this method is to master one step at a time.    Although each person responds differently to these exercises, you can expect to spend about a week on each step.

Before you begin, you'll need to learn how your body responds to sexual stimulation. Masturbate until you can identify how you feel moments before your "point of no return".    Now you're ready.

Step One

Masturbate with a dry hand (without lubricant). Stimulate your penis until just before you ejaculate, then stop all stimulation. Wait until your erection goes down slightly then start again. Continue the stop/start cycle until you can maintain an erection for fifteen minutes. Stop as many times as you need to during the fifteen minutes to avoid ejaculation!

You're Ready For Step Two

Repeat Step One, but add a lubricant when you masturbate.  Continue to stimulate, stop, let your erection go down, and start again until you reach fifteen minutes without ejaculation.

Step Three Involves Your Partner

Have your partner give your penis manual stimulation without a lubricant. Concentrate on communicating with your partner. By the time you've completed Step Three, you'll both learn to stop and start until you can maintain your erection for fifteen minutes.

Step Four

Repeat Step Three, but add a lubricant. When you have worked up to fifteen minutes without ejaculation, you're ready for Step Five.

Step Five

You're ready for controlled intercourse. You should be on top when you enter your partner. Both of you should remain as motionless as possible throughout intercourse. Your goal is to last fifteen minutes without ejaculating.

Step Six

You should continue to be on top, and your partner should remain as motionless as possible. Now it's time for you to add movement to your lovemaking. Thrusting increases stimulation to your penis significantly. You'll be able to enjoy the added stimulation by learning to stop thrusting before ejaculation. When you can last fifteen minutes, you're ready for Step Seven.

Step Seven

Step Seven is the reverse of Step Six. You remain motionless while your partner moves on top of you. Focus on communicating. Together, you can learn to stop before you ejaculate too soon.

Now you're ready for sex without any rules!

Premature ejaculation is frustrating for both partners. Now would be a good time for you to do something special to let your partner know how much you appreciate her patience. You may also want to explore other options for treatment with a licensed sex therapist.